6/29/2023 0 Comments Giant machines 2017 transformersStand-up comedian Jerrod Carmichael offers a dose of comic relief as another stray Cade picks up.įans of Optimus Prime, Bumblebee and the gang will be more than satisfied with the spectacle, but with that bloated running time, the movie wears out its welcome, not to mention your brain. On the off chance that anybody cares, Josh Duhamel is also back as an assault-weapons-toting soldier for the TRF (Transformers Reaction Force) and “Veep” funnyman Tony Hale plays a scientist who warns about the impending doom. The best new character is Hopkins’ ’bot butler, Cogman, a C3-PO knockoff voiced by “Downton Abbey’s” Jim Carter. Another spot of fun is the ‘Bot banter back at Cade’s junkyard voiced by a talented cast that includes Erik Aadahl (Bumblebee), John Goodman (Hound), Ken Watanabe (Drift), Omar Sy (Hot Rod) and John DiMaggio as the cute WALL-E clone, Sqweeks. officials the release of his baddies from a Gitmo-like prison. In a rare moment of entertainment, his mortal enemy, Megatron, negotiates with U.S. Meanwhile, Optimus Prime is being brainwashed. Conspiracy theorist and franchise veteran John Turturro rings in from Havana (an Autobot sanctuary city, go figure) with information about the elusive weapon, too. In London, Oscar-winner Anthony Hopkins minds a secret society of Autobot protectors and needs the good guys to get the staff to vanquish Quintessa, the mysterious sorceress of the robot planet Cybertron. If only that much diligence was taken with the rest of the film. But, like the women before her, Haddock doesn’t escape Bay’s leering camera. Poor Fox had to endure spiked heels in the earlier movies. Bay gets points for actually giving the Hot Girl something substantial to do and for outfitting her in sensible footwear instead of stilettos while fleeing angry, armed robots. Eventually, he lands in England and teams up with a sexy history professor (is there such a thing?) named Vivian (Megan Fox lookalike Laura Haddock) to help him retrieve the staff and yada, yada, yada. In an attempt to add emotional heft, the screenwriters insert a homeless orphan, Izabella (Isabela Moner) into Cade’s story. Wahlberg does that a lot of late in flicks like “Deepwater Horizon” and “Patriots Day,” except this time he looks more bored, as if he can’t wait to be free of a franchise he claims he’s now finished with. The script draws him out because he’s the chosen one who must save the world from destruction. Cade hides in a scrapyard in the South Dakota Badlands. oh, forget it, Bay doesn’t want us to get that deep. After the events in the last movie, Cade is on the lam for being an Autobot sympathizer, a stance that doesn’t sit well with his fellow Americans who regard them as unwelcome aliens. Also, there’s a powerful staff that “one day a great hero will come for.” That becomes the movie’s macguffin, involving about five subplots spread across the globe - none of them coherent.īoston homey Mark Wahlberg reprises his role as struggling inventor Cade Yeager. It’s soon revealed that Transformers do indeed go back to the Middle Ages. In a prologue battle that feels like “Game of Thrones” meets “King Arthur,” he leaves you questioning if you’re watching the right movie. Your eyes haven’t even adjusted to the dark before Bay launches his first fireball. This time they pen a tale that rewrites history and legend, showing how the Big ’Bots had a hand in giving Merlin (Stanley Tucci) his magic and delivering the coup de gras to Hitler. However, a special pair of glasses can’t disguise the movie’s many faults, namely sloppy storytelling at the hands of writers Art Marcum, Matt Holloway and Ken Nolan. It’s a full-blown orgy of metal, bullets, lead and fire engaged in an all-out assault on your senses. The battle scenes are overwrought - long, loud and ludicrous. Here’s what you need to know: It’s a spectacle, especially in IMAX 3-D. And so, a decade after he rolled out the first flick based on a line of toys and cartoon series from the '80s, Bay, offers another huge, cacophonous calamity in which the Autobots and Decepticons face off in a butt-busting 150 minutes of giant machines demolishing each other. Would you expect anything less from director Michael Bay, taking his fifth stab at his erector-set of a movie franchise?įrom “Pearl Harbor” to “Armageddon,” to “13 Hours,” Bay’s motto has always been to go big or go home, and here he even one-ups himself. The storytelling is messy and the movie is loud - really loud. “Transformers: The Last Knight” is another huge pyrotechnic porno that leaves a metallic taste in your mouth.
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